ARCADIA, Calif. – The phone rang and that’s all it did. Calls were not returned. When the television was on, it was not tuned to horse racing programs. In early October, California jockey Drayden Van Dyke walked away from racing at a time when mental aspects of the sport and personal issues had become overwhelming. After a decade of riding with minimal interruption, Van Dyke, 29, stopped. He needed time for himself. Three months later, Van Dyke is preparing to return to riding. He visited Santa Anita during training hours Monday and was warmly received by trainers, exercise riders, and fellow jockeys. His outlook, he said, has changed for the better during his self-imposed hiatus. “I’ve always been afraid to get away from this place, that I’ll miss something or some business,” he said. “I’ve never really lived. “I was following myself and my heart. I knew I needed to get away. You have to look out for yourself, or you can go down the wrong path. It’s a cliché, but it’s okay to say you’re not okay and take the time you need. “I’ve done a lot of learning, a lot of semi-growing up. Not that I wasn’t grown already. I had a lot to register.” :: Bet with the Best! Get FREE All-Access PPs and Weekly Cashback when you wager on DRF Bets. Toward the end of the Del Mar summer meeting in early September, Van Dyke began contemplating a break. A former leading rider at Del Mar, Van Dyke was struggling to find winners and was unhappy. “It was building up to where I wanted to follow myself instead of trying to please others,” he said. “Toward the end of Del Mar, I felt it really strong. I knew I needed to get myself right or I’d go further and further down. It was all mental. It was not drug-related or drinking too much. It was my mental approach. It took a while to get a hold of it. “When I stopped, I was angry. I was mean with people. I wasn’t that guy I was when I came around. I was a nice kid. I was very respectful. I was losing my ways. I had to get back to my roots.” Before Christmas, after more than two months away from racing, Van Dyke began answering his phone and returning calls. He said he still needs to reach out to many people. He has resumed watching races, eager to get back involved on a day-to-day basis. “People were calling me. I didn’t answer,” Van Dyke said. “I had no answer. I was semi-embarrassed. “It’s kind of funny. I didn’t want to show my face. I didn’t want to come back or talk to anyone until I was ready. “Looking back on it, I wish I would have been more vocal. A few people that did reach out, I should have gotten back to them.” Through the fall, Van Dyke’s routine was a lifestyle without a routine. Instead of a schedule determined by racing days or mornings filled with workouts, he focused on physical fitness in his home gym, or riding a bike or running in the hills above Santa Anita. There was ample time for contemplation, not only about career goals, but also more private matters such as better communication with family and reflecting on memories of his father, Seth, a former jockey who committed suicide in 2014 at 43. Van Dyke won the Eclipse Award as the nation’s outstanding apprentice that year at the age of 19. “One thing I never cleared from my mind was my father’s suicide,” Van Dyke said. “I’ve been talking with my mom a lot about it. “I never really had time to process that. I kept working and I kept riding races. I learned to block it out. “When it first happened, in the first four or five years, I would cry all the time. I finally feel at peace with it. I haven’t seen his grave since I went to the funeral. The funeral was a blur. I don’t remember any of that time.” Van Dyke has won 809 races. He was the leading rider at the Del Mar summer and fall meetings in 2018, a year that included a seven-win day at Del Mar that August. For 2023, he had only five wins. “I know my capabilities,” he said. “My résumé speaks for itself. You don’t win seven in one day because you can’t ride. You can ride if you win seven in one day at Del Mar.” Returning to a high level of achievement is a goal for 2024, whether it occurs at Del Mar or Santa Anita, or somewhere else in the nation. For now, the focus is on riding in Southern California. Van Dyke said that by channeling energy and time toward physical fitness has had a benefit in advance of his comeback. “The results have been crazy,” he said. “I’ve never been as fit and I’ve never been as strong. “I’ve never been better in my life. I’m so excited to get started and get back going on horses.” :: Want to learn more about handicapping and wagering? Check out DRF's Handicapping 101 and Wagering 101 pages.